The Overview of Scorched Pencils

What can Scorched Pencils do for you?

Absolutely Nothing! That’s right.

We create the freshest, purest Nothing that money can’t buy. And 100% of our Nothing is American made by genuine American women and men with red white and blue blood right here in the great USA.

The Nothing we make is hand-crafted every day on our factory floor. We start with a crisp batch of chemical imbalance, mix in plenty of cynicism and pessimism, season generously with disdain, then add just a touch of apathy to round off each batch. Finally, we sit and stew for hours until ready to boil to bring you absolutely nothing of value at all.

Why do we do it?

Well, the folks at Scorched Pencils think you deserve to have Nothing. That’s why we’ve filled our web site with all the Nothing anyone would ever need. So go ahead, click a link and get started. Just remember, the next time you think of Scorched Pencils, you're thinking of nothing at all!

Meet our team so far

Tripping over skills to get to the top

Mr. Engelmonster

Growing up in the wilds of Minnesota, Shawn Engelmann’s 2 favorite shows as a child were "In Search Of… “ with Leonard Nimoy and “The Muppet Show”. They would remain close to his heart, even as he entered college to pursue a career as an English teacher. After the sudden realization that he hated children, he turned his academic attention instead toward graphic design and multimedia, after 7 years he eventually graduated form college with a degree in something or other, he doesn’t really remember what. So don’t ask.


The One and only Chew

Carved from the heart of a dying dwarf star, our technical expert Ed Cichocki runs much of the behind the scenes operations of the show.
When he’s not monitoring sound equipment or cameras on set, or reviewing the website, he can be found creating the various animations and awesome artwork for Creepy Acres, Studeski & Hooch and Havoksins. That is if we can talk him off the ledge long enough to work on them.


Feel free to give Scorched Pencils a call out...

We may or may not get back to you in an time sometimes here at a Scorched Pencils we get extremely busy, mostly doing nothing, because doing nothing takes up a lot of time.

Have a great day.

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